Re: talking

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Written by Bob Knight at 02 Mar 2000 18:51:26:

As an answer to: talking written by Peter at 01 Mar 2000 22:34:40:

Okay, Peter, I'm not a mother so can no way tell you how a mother thinks about circumcision for her son. Having said that, a few generalizations may have some affect on the mother's thinking: 1) first of all, most American males alive today are circumcised, so her husband or boyfriend is probably circ'd too. So the reason to be "just like dad" may be operating even though it's not a particularly good one; 2) secondly, she may never have seen an uncircumcised penis, therefore the circ'd one looks "normal" to her, as a girlfriend once told me, while the old-fashioned classical phallus looks "funny" (I think this is where Americans part company with most Germans, who admire the classical bodies exhibited by Greek and Roman statuary, and consider circumcision a mutilation, which most Americans do not); 3) thirdly, there are some reasons (probably not major ones!) why a circ'd penis is more likely to be healthy than the uncut kind; 4) about 20-25% of boys and later men have problems with the uncircumcised penises, such as phimosis and frenulum breve, and such problems obviously don't appear with circumcision--the circ'ed kid grows up unconscious of the existence of a foreskin, feeling perfectly normal; 5) most American men as individuals have no problem with being circumcised, and enjoy sex fully. Another "reason," I think not too well thought out, is that in a way Americans and circumcision were invented for each other: Americans are convenience-oriented (don't want the trouble of having to retract and clean under a foreskin every day) and somewhat obsessed with personal hygiene, considering the circ'd penis to be cleaner than the uncut one, and also are cancerophobic, even though penile cancer is quite rare in our culture. "Culture" is one of the operative words, I think. Circumcision became a part of popular American middle-class culture sometime between 1900 and 1950, and many people now do it out of habit, without even giving it much thought. So to summarize, once the RIC has been done and the kid has recovered from it, he & his mother both forget about it and consider him to be normal. I'm not claiming that's good or bad, just how it seems to be. Of course I'm not a mother & certainly would not try to speak for any mother, but I've heard all the "reasons" listed above cited as justifying circumcision. You may get some feedback from mothers speaking for themselves which you certainly can trust in preference to what I've said. Btw, I have no problem with my own circumcision, personally wouldn't want to go through life unbeschnitten, because it's just lots more convenient being circ'd (I'm American too!) and I can't think of any disadvantages (certainly not penile insensitivity). Hope you get some of the response you asked for. Best wishes, RJK.

>>I live in USA, New Jersey...you say you are from Germany? Cool!
>>Nice talking to you...
>>--The "other" Marnie
>>
>>>Happy (cut) greetings from Germany
>>>Peter
>Hi Marnie,
>thank You for posting, too. Let's start "talking"!
>As You know, I'm from Germany and here is RIC completely unknown (exept turkish people and jews, of course).
>For me it would be interesting to know, what a mother is thinking, when she decides to go for circumcision whith the child (is it the most normal thing, is it a special kind of care, ...) are you standing besides and look at this procedure performing?
>What are the feelings of a mother of a circ'd child, when You see his small, circumcised willy? Are You proud of it, do You think it is good for the future wife, do You think that he got propper health-care?
>Perhaps - or sure - this sounds if I would be anti-circ; but this is not true!!!
>I'm only interested in knowing these things, because here in Germany this procedure is not routinely performed. I can not talk about this, because no mother or father is doing so!
>I'm thoroughly convinced, that RIC is not only not a bad thing, there are different advatages! I had been very thankful, if my parents had decided to get me circ'd!!! (I got circ'd for different reasons, when I was 27.)
>But although this is my conviction I would not have the nerves to fight against all people around me and get a future son circumcised!
>Perhaps You understand my interest and can answer.
>Happy (cut) greetings from Germany
>Peter