[ ARC forum 2 ]
Written by RJK at 08 Jun 2001 18:40:13: Re: Frenulum Breve
As an answer to: Re: Frenulum Breve written by Jon at 08 Jun 2001 02:42:17:
Stacey, what Jon has to say looks like pretty good advice. It would seem unlikely that a twice-torn frenulum would tear again, but that probably depends on how it healed. You might make a GENTLE investigation to see whether it looks as if it's set to rip again, but if you can persuade him to visit a sympathetic, cooperative urologist, that should put you on the track to eliminating the problem. Best wishes, rjk.
>Stacey,
>Your boyfriend is right, a Frenulum tearing during intercourse is a very painful and traumatic experience. I am also working through the complications of a tight frenulum which tears during intercourse, and trying to figure out the best way to deal with it. If he (and you) have patience, it seems that slow stretching has worked for some people. However, there is also a simple operation that can be performed in order to relieve the stress on the frenulum. It involves making a slit in the frenulum, which is then stitched up. I am trying now to decide if this is the best option to take (I'd be interested to hear what the site expert has to say about this). As for fellatio, I would ask him if it's cool to try it and it's very possible that this would not cause pain and be very pleasurable, (In my experience fellatio doesn't cause enough stress to damage the frenulum further, though if it is very tight it is possible that it would be uncomfortable). In short, it depends on his comfort level. It seems that in general (and in my case) masturbation and other forms of sex aside from penetration are still possible, and pleasureable, for people with frenulum breve. I would reccomend that he see a good urologist (one that wont try to circumcise him) and take a more active role in resolving this problem. Also, as a male with a caring girlfriend, I can tell you that your support and love for him in this situation is very important. It may not seem like a big deal for such a small flap of skin but a man's penis is very important to his self-esteem. No matter what we can always rely on our penises and when that is called in to question, our world is shaken. That may sound a bit dramatic, but it is the truth. I applaud you for your forthrightness in addressing this situation in your relationship and hope you both the best. -Jon
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>>My boyfriend had sex with a previous girlfriend and his frenulum tore. He said it was an awful experience and although he tried again some time later, it happened again. He is very unsure of having sex again, although he believes that he no longer has a frenulum and so he thinks it shouldn't be a problem. Reading the posts on these pages, I'm not so sure that this is the case and am nervous that another bad experience with me would put him off intercourse even more! Also, if I've read things correctly, would giving him fellatio hurt as well? He hasn't complained, but then maybe he's just being polite? I know that touching and feeling is great, but how do I make things sensational for him?