[ ARC forum 2 ]
Written by stephen at 05 May 2004 23:19:31: Re: 8 yr old son
As an answer to: 8 yr old son written by Mom of 2 boys at 04 May 2004 18:27:14:
>This weekend my 8 yr old came to me complaining of feeling like he could not completely empty his bladder, that urination was burning sometimes, and that sometimes he felt like he had to go but couldn’t. We went to the family doc yesterday, and the urine culture results will be in tomorrow. The family doc referred us to a urologist because “men shouldn’t be having those symptoms, and even if it is a simple UTI, men should not get UTI’s”
>His foreskin does not retract at all. It used to retract enough to barely see the end of the penis, but a pediatrician forced it back and made it bleed when he was 3 ½, and it has not retracted since.
>Through some gentle discussions over the last several days, he has told me that his foreskin area is painful when he has erections. I showed him a diagram of how that skin is supposed to move, and (as casually as possible) mentioned that it should feel kinda good to do that. He gave me a very shocked look and said “no way mom – that HURTS!” Now, I have asked him if the painful part is on the underneath side, and he says yes it is.
>So…would that be the frenulum breve that I’ve found discussed on some websites? (not sure if I spelled that correctly)
>Those of you that have needed surgery as adults: Did you also have painful erections in pre-puberty? Is this something that might correct itself, or something that should be surgically corrected NOW? I want to be prepared with some information when we see the urologist next week, in case he immediately says “yep needs circ’d” and doesn’t offer options. I’d like some realistic viewpoints from guys who’ve been there. Of course we will seek a second opinion if surgery is recommended.
>How do you find a doctor who is not biased either anti-circ or pro-circ? I want to make the best choice for MY son, not for someone’s agenda either way. Most websites I’ve found are either strongly pro-circ, strongly anti-circ, or pornographic circ-fetish sites. Unbiased information on circ beyond infancy seems practically non-existent.
>He is aware of what circumcision is. He knows that his 5-yr old brother’s foreskin has retracted fully for years now. He knows his friends don’t have foreskin at all. He has actually asked me these past few days if he can be circumcised. He does not want to “mess with” topical cream and stretching exercises. While I want to respect his choice, I also don’t want to make a decision that he will regret later. I explained that the frenulum can be cut if that is what is causing him pain, but that he would have to be careful not to let it adhere back during the healing process. He shook his head and said “nah let’s just do the circumthingy.” So much for all the theories about boys feeling like they might lose part of themselves if their foreskins are cut!
>I know this has been long, and I thank you for your time and honest responses.
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My son also had the same problem as your son but instead of not retracting, it stayed retracted. It got stuck behind the glans when he was eight and was causing him alot of pain. The doc said he could streach the skin or do a circ. I did leave it up to my son and he said that he wanted it done since he kept it back anyway. Mainly because he wanted to look like me and his three cousins. he didnt to be differnt. So let him get it done, its better to do it now before he starts puberity. The doc said when he was born that circumcison wasnt necessary and that less parents in the U.S. are haveing it done. Was he ever wrong. I hope this helps in decideing but let the choice mainly be his.