[ ARC forum 2 ]

Re: Problems indeed

Written by paul at 04 Mar 2002 21:57:13:

As an answer to: Problems indeed written by Paul B. at 03 Mar 2002 13:25:38:

i have read the various posts in relation to me,very interesting reading as well,and i take interest in all.


Scizophrenic i will have tell my alter ego about that one.

no i only jest.


it is a problem i would like to get sorted,all the problems ref the possible Phimosis i have tried various methods,i am only 37 and cleaning of my genitals is probably the most annoying of the problems,the lack of a good woman is something else,and i doubt if my relationship probs would be sorted out even whether i did or did not have Phimosis.


it seems no matter what i do i cannot keep my penis clean and that is worrying,i do not want to smell like a pissed tramp[no offence],but a working man at 37 that is at the very least a real turn off for any relationship.


I have some very good friends,who re assure me i do not smell,but when any jokes occur at work about smell,i always seem to be the butt of them[paranoia].

Jim made a good point,about acting like a teenager,thats the problem i missed a normal teenage male life due to hang ups reference my genital problems,mainly my testicles not hanging down and i mean at all everthing,including most of the time my penis would not hang down,mainly just a large bit of foreskin.


Looking back i know i should not of let it worry me,but i was 9/10 years old and when you see the others in the show your natural curiosity gets the better of you and i realised something was wrong,i had a book given to me on sex,which said some boys will have both male and female sex organs,and that frightened the living daylights out of me.


I have had counselling and found it useful in fact but,at the end of the day i think most of us have some kind of problems,you get rid of one you promptly find another.


i think though that the world would be a better place of if we could all get better sexual health teaching at an early age,boys and girls being taught more about there bodies,but i realise that this could also create other problems as well.


I do think though i my problems are probably more related to the earlier testicle problem and not Phimosis,but either way i will have to bite the bullet and get checked out by a doctor.

regards Paul

> Is this the cruel to be kind approach ?
>It sounds more like the "honestly stating the thunderingly obvious" approach to me.
>This fellow (Jim, he is 37, not 27!) describes extreme difficulties with interpersonal relationships, both with male peers and potential female partners.
>While this is projected onto a feeling of genital inadequacy, and it is obvious his (sexual) education is poor (sadly, only too common an occurrence), the strong possibility is that he suffers primary schizophrenia, and he most certainly needs a psychiatric assessment or if he has already had one and slipped out of treatment, a review. The age of onset, 10 or 11, is quite supportive of such a diagnosis.
>Whether or not that should be the case, he requires a good psychologist/ therapist with whom to work through his problems. Point is, though it might be "too much to hope for", were he able to attract a sympathetic partner and assuming his genital concerns (such as "i believe i may smell even if i do not") are not of psychotic intensity, all such concerns should be able to be dispelled.
>But as I imply, such a good partner is a rare commodity - I can think of many people who should only be so lucky as to find one!


Answers: