[ ARC forum 2 ]
Written by Paul B. at 05 Sep 2002 15:02:31: More
As an answer to: Re: More: Progress... written by Andy at 05 Sep 2002 08:14:25:
> I think it's because she's only been with circ'ed guys before I've talked to her, and she's just worried that this will cause me pain during intercourse. She's perfectly ok with it if it doesn't cause any pain.
Well, that's rather sweet, if only because it seems to me a bit "topsy-turvy" - the usual situation being that the girl is anxious that she will be hurt or get sore and that the guy may not even notice this happening. Presumably this is a consequence of the (expected) desensitisation resulting from circumcision.
>>> ... causing an hourglass effect.
>> Uncomfortable or not?Answer?
> No, I've not had sex with her.
And fair enough. She may even have a hymen still!
> We've masturbated each other, though.
The fact that you are taking things "easy", in no hurry, bodes extremely well for for your relationship. Is there a Christian commitment behind this?
May I just caution you on one little thing - that if you reserve intercourse (actually, I refer to both solitary and mutual masturbation as "sex" anyway,) for your marriage, that you don't forget to be just as careful on your wedding night/ honeymoon when you "go for it".
She was surprised because she didn't know that phimosis could be 'fixed' through stretching, and had suggested earlier that I get circ'ed.
An amiable ignorance. We hope through this forum and Fathermag for starters, to correct that - to make enough "noise" so that wherever people discuss circumcision and phimosis, the concept of stretching must arise, at which point, people can search and find out for themselves - as you evidently have!
> Now that she sees progress, she is very encouraging in my stretching exercises.
Given all you describe so far, I would expect so. Do you for one, actually go through it with her?
>> If they do not stay put, where do they go?
> They go out. I find it difficult to stretch the foreskin, insert the dilator, and tape it properly at the same time (not enough hands).Right - fair enough; I am not surprised. This follows from the other - how much daily contact do you have with your fiancé? I mean there's an extra set of hands for the asking! {;-)}
> I've read posts here where you're supposed to roll back the foreskin and then roll forward, with the foreskin goes over the dilator, but mine rarely does,
Sounds like something you will be able to do later, when it is stretched enough to go back over your glans, even if only when limp.
> unless the dilator is really small.
In which case, it won't help much.
> Otherwise, the elasticity is too tight, and it quickly snaps down on the glans. Maybe some step-by-step instructions would help.
I see your problem.
- Use lubricant to help get the object in place.
- My suggestion is that you pull the foreskin forward, away from the glans.
- If you can get to use that extra pair of hands to help this, so much the better!
- Use a dilator that is already (plastic hose offcut, end flame-smoothed), or is made tubular by boring out (a rubber bung), so that you can keep it in place once taped, even when you pee.
- Placing it with only one set of hands will in particular be easier if you pull it forward to stretch. Pull on one side, grip the object against that side, and pull the other side over it.
- Although it may seem more difficult, do try and get the wider end inward for two reasons - it will tend to slip out less, as that "snap" you describe will be working in your favour, and you want the bluntest end to be touching your glans.
Keep asking!
- Re: More andy 9/06/2002 09:45 (2)
- Options Paul B. 9/06/2002 13:41 (1)
- Re: Options Jim 9/06/2002 16:54 (0)
- Re: More Ralesk 9/05/2002 15:36 (0)