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Written by Paul B. at 06 Sep 2002 13:41:42:

As an answer to: Re: More written by andy at 06 Sep 2002 09:45:35:

> I've never considered not-retracting to hurt during intercourse.

Exactly!

> There is much more literature and counselling on how you should go slow with the girl, make sure she is well lubricated, etc.

Only if you can read and learn. Obviously, many cannot do this.

> Not uncomfortable. The frenar band usually slides upwards towards the glans to find a "happy-medium", so to speak.

Then there is nothing that should cause you difficulty. Your proposal to keep it back at night, protected by a condom, might help if only it were do-able! Keep stretching by all the other means in the meantime it if you think it needs to be more mobile.

> Is there a Christian commitment behind this?
> Kind of ...

Well, I would presume that either there is, ... or there isn't. If there is, you need not be afraid to say so.

> but also we both agree to take it slow, as we feel it helps the relationship to not repress ourselves sexually, but to try to focus on meeting each other's needs elsewhere as well. We believe that intercourse should be a climax of all the petting done during the engagement ... besides, it's fun to pet :)

Excellent summary.

> Heehee, that would be fun, I think.

Sure would! On these boards, one often sees people who want to modify something, or "learn" something in private, to impress their (proposed) partner. But they don't realise that the learning is the loving - it's not about impressing the girl with "macho", but sharing the whole experience with her.

> But unfortunately, we're still having a long distance relationship for the next month or so while she completes her job in another city.

Obviously that is a valid reason for going ahead on your own, but I suggest, the only valid reason.

> I'll try to visit the hardware shop this weekend and take a look at what I can find :)

Consider rubber or plastic bungs, grommets, styrofoam pieces, soft tubing, and thermoplastic or thermosetting plastic putty.


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