[ ARC forum 2 ]

Perhaps, perhaps ...

Written by Paul B. at 05 Feb 2003 13:23:18:

As an answer to: Re: Perhaps Unjustified. written by Aussie girl at 04 Feb 2003 21:36:54:

> Well AJ came in and said he didn't even have Phillip's address, and said he couldn't have sent Phillip a virus.

I was somewhat more interested in what the enigmatic Phillip had to say in reply. Not much, I gather.

> It's actually impossible to have a friendship with anyone with a personality disorder.

It's blinkin' difficult I grant you.

> I've known several people with them, and it isn't possible to hold a conversation with them because their thought processes are short circuited, they can't comprehend what we're saying, they say the weirdest things, won't let anyone else have their own opinion, and they believe they are okay and it's everyone else who has the serious problems.

An excellent summary, certainly. It's interesting to consider that whilst traditionally considered a different condition, these may turn out to be psychoses similar to endogenous depression and schizophrenia, as they also involve faulty processing of information and an inability to understand reality. So far as I understand, they have never been found to be responsive to medication, but - who knows what the future may hold?

> The worst of those with personality disorders was the ex boyfriend who was also violent and abusive.

Different personality disorder. He was apparently sociopathic (AKA "Psychopathic"; "Antisocial", possibly other synonyms), focussing his malice on others, whereas we are dealing with an obsessive/ obsessive-compulsive (I must say, I'm not entirely clear how much of each, and they are not the same - indeed OCD does respond quite well to antidepressants), who mostly injures himself.

Consequently, the poor bugger is lonely - that is only too obvious, and literally "looking for friendship" amongst - he hopes - people who will value his "experience". But I don't (believe it or not) think he's entirely malicious in intent, unlike your "ex-", who is of the type that aren't searching for respect, but for fear! May I presume he is by now in prison, or is he on parole?

> Yes it's exactly like the pet venomous snake. They'll strike the person who gets too close, even when that person is trying to look after them.

Actually, I had in mind that venomous snakes are quite manageable when they are tame, as long as you don't make a mistake and hurt them. Viz. our own Crocodile Hunter.

> Well that's exactly what I said to him in http://f19.parsimony.net/forum33578/messages/6873.htm
> and that's why I haven't complained to geocities about him because he is indeed helping us and can't even see it.

Perhaps a more relevant reason is - they most likely don't give a damn, and consider it trivial. They must be up to their (digital) eyeballs in complaints about the crap that is posted on their sites.

> What I was upset about was the fact that he's actually trying very hard to hurt me and Jim for no reason.

I understand your hurt, but then, you can cope with it, and he can't. I do tend to think that it's not exactly malicious, because he simply has no insight - he's just trying to do as we do - win an argument, prove a point. And of course, if you or I, or perhaps the intemperate Jim, should use a term which is clinically accurate, as I have just been doing, then naturally he views it as an insult, and seeks to reply in kind.

It's really a quite ironic situation, I have to say


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