[ ARC forum 2 ]
Written by Paul B. at 06 May 2003 22:58:57: Not so hasty
As an answer to: Long Tight Foreskin Very scared written by Scared Kid at 06 May 2003 21:56:10:
> My penis is of a normal size yet when on the soft i find it difficult to pull back my foreskin its an effort but it can be done.
Well then my friend, do it - again and again, back and forward again, every time you pee, if only for a minute or however much time you have, and while you are relaxed in private.
> Erect i got no chance its just too tight and i have half a centimeter of foreskin still from the tip of the head.
Then you are lucky.
> Im very scared
If you are scared, it must be of something else than your foreskin. Perhaps you should address that problem separately.
> and I really dont want circumsision
I'm glad to hear it. That would indicate a mental problem, given you have no cause to "need" it.
> but i do want the fastest method of correcting my problem and the fastest way of healing as i am pressured into sleeping with someone before i lose them (long story please dont ask)
It is a generally accepted truth, that this is a ploy which indicates that you have a concern for which you are seeking an expression of sympathy so that you can come forth with the story and discuss it in detail. As such, you are welcome to do so, but must be warned, there will be some but not universal sympathy to what you say, and nothing can be guaranteed. Nevertheless it will prove more useful than stressing over your fixation with your dick.
Oh yes, your dick. That's what we, or certainly, you, started talking about. But you have digressed on to your concerns that there is apparently some expectation that you are to have sex with (that being the connotation of "sleeping with") someone. Perhaps a young lady? And that this is not the sort of young lady with whom you have a long-term relationship, but one who is only available as a "good-time girl", wanting some sexual titillation and (since very few will want you for that alone) you to spend some money on her?
Well, so be it. If you are so inclined, "sleep" with her then. Where is the problem? Certainly not with your dick, because you indicate you have erections, and reading between the lines, I am certain that you manage to masturbate and enjoy the consequence. Is that not the case? What more could you want?
> Im willing to pay alot of money
Really?
> and have really been worrying to the extent of considering suicide, (again dont ask)
Again, we understand - you have problems, or at least concerns.
> I am really hoping someone can help me, i would like the problem sorted in 7 weeks if possible
It may be advisable to see a doctor for referral specifically to a counsellor or psychotherapist - whatever is available in your area. Probably you don't need to see a doctor, but could see the psychotherapist directly. I might have suggested otherwise, but you have indicated that you have the wherewithal to pay for their services, so it should be money well spent.
> anyone that can help and i am succesful will definately be reawarded
Most of us will be rewarded merely to hear that you (hopefully) become at peace with your situation, and perhaps (though I cannot honestly say that there sounds to me much of a future with it) that you succeed in consummating your amorous relationship. Regrettably, some will feed on your anxiety and advise you to repeat their own miseries. In the longer term, you should most certainly be able to get your foreskin fully "working" also, thought this is another matter entirely and quite unrelated to the relationship aspect.
And since this is the original focus of this forum rather than your relationship problems (which we are however happy to discuss, no doubt about that), then do keep in contact, and tell us what the result is, of a week of determined retraction and re-covering of your flaccid (soft) glans (penis head) in terms of tightness, and as an idea from an earlier thread, just which of your fingers (including the thumb) you can get to fit through the foreskin and how far it will go in?
This will probably be an easier method to stretch it and has the advantage that having got the finger to go in and stretch the foreskin tightly, you can sit there (need not be exposed either) performing the stretching quite comfortably for many minutes at a time.
As I go to post this now, I note that Ivan has replied also. He has picked up the critical points also, particularly the one about the condom.