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The idea that retraction is unnecessary could be 1) due to repression
of actual experiences of pain and difficulty, 2) it may be learnt
as the result of the approach of unpleasant and growing sensations
of discomfort, or 3) it may be simply that retraction feels unnatural
or is impossible. Experiences of this kind may take place semi-consciously
even before puberty begins.
 In other words, this blindness is not due to stupidity on the part
of the boy. Not only is there a severe lack of information to guide
the family doctor and parents, but also an otherwise healthy boy accepts
his body without worrying, and grows accustomed to his own condition,
through erections and self play, possibly even previous to puberty.
There is an area of his own sexual world which a boy with these conditions
can't explore, even something he thinks he's not meant to explore.
His knowledge is that the foreskin is designed to remain forward. He
believes his condition to be normal and healthy, and he is unaware
that he has any limitation which requires treatment.
Ultra-sound pictures have shown that baby boys have erections in the
womb. Reports from parents indicate that a boy may start innocently
playing with his erect penis (with foreskin retraction), at the age
of one and a half years old. It is therefore possible that the learning
process may start even before puberty begins.
At the beginning of puberty most boys begin to masturbate consciously.
It is generally accepted that the most normal method of doing this,
is by moving the foreskin. With these conditions a freely moveable
foreskin at the same time as a full erection is impossible. A boy with
these conditions develops a sexual relationship with himself, which
is to some extent, restrained or restricted, (and he believes that
this is normal).
ADULT INITIATIONS
With both phimosis and the frenulum breve, the final recognition of
the condition often follows a conscious experience of pain or difficulty.
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The complaints are often discovered when making love or attempting
to, because at this time they are unavoidable. At this time, the erection,
penetration and ejaculation are not exclusively controlled by one's
own hands.
A practising Urologist says, "it is not uncommon, . . that a phimosis
is not at all consciously realised by the carrier until the first act
of love" 14. With some degrees of phimosis, (during intercourse, when
the vagina is unlubricated) the foreskin can ruffle up in a turtle
neck making penetration difficult or impossible. It may not be obvious
to the individual that something anatomical is not in working order,
he may think that love making merely requires practice.
Some men with the frenulum breve have the experience of the frenulum
suddenly ripping while making love, others experience pain and tension,
especially during ejaculation. It is clear that when the frenulum rips,
this can save years of adult problems.
There are inevitably a number of types of experience which have not
come to my attention.
THE TABOO CONTINUES
Some men, like myself, do not consciously experience any pain or difficulty,
they believe the foreskin is designed to remain forward, and have adapted
to this. When a problem is conscious one can come to terms with it,
and even turn it to some greater strength. Here, the basic problem
and many of the symptoms are unconscious, or misinterpreted by the
carrier himself, as being of a psychological nature.
Two men who I spoke with had been in the situation of having an extreme
phimosis without realising this. One of these never masturbated or
had any interest in sex before his operation. The other, after describing
how he washed under the foreskin with an extreme phimosis, (by flushing
the area out with a squeezing action), told me he thought that "everyone's
normal, we're all just a bit different". I can not prove anything about these men except
that they had very few sexual experiences.
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